Dream a Little Dream for Me

When I was younger I would spend a lot of time daydreaming about things. I would construct epic tales and scenarios in my mind right down to dialogue and atmosphere. Usually these imaginings were centered on meeting My True Love. Way back in the day I was convinced at an early age (aged 14) that my destiny would be found on a North Carolina beach. I knew exactly how it would happen. I would be strolling along the beach on a creative brainstorming mission, lost in thought. A warm breeze would be blowing my gauze-like white dress and my suddenly thick and luxurious long hair all about me while my future love would be coming back to the docks after a long day of tortured time on his father's fishing boat. (You see, he was a poet and a writer forced into working the family fishing boat out of duty and obligation). Our eyes would meet and it would be kismet... We would spend our days painting and writing in our gigantic beach front home (because magically, our chance meeting would inspire my love to quit fishing and pursue his dream. And as his muse, I would unlock the Best Selling Novel which had previously been trapped in his head and we would have riches beyond our imaginations. Because writers makes TONS of money you know...). My studio would overlook the ocean. There would be a widow's walk where I could go for fresh air and a rocking chair on the front porch where I would sit and sing to our babies. We would have a golden retriever named Newton and a lighthouse nearby shining the way...

Of course this never happened and I giggle now at my youthful, amateur heart. But it was a fun way to pass the time. You do A LOT of daydreaming when you live in the country.

And now I see this same trait in my oldest child. I notice how he will plan out scenarios and conversations and how he can become SO EXCITED at the thought of something wonderful that when it actually happens, he is disappointed. It never, ever seems to live up to his expectations because his imagination is bigger then reality. I sometimes worry about this and wonder, will he always be left wanting? Will he become so used to being let down by the reality of life? When I look back at my own life I recall my disappointments were generated from life never playing out the way I had scripted it in my head. Proms were not that enchanting, jobs were not that fulfilling and even harder, relationships were not always and forever. With age and maturity I have learned to be more realistic with expectations: Parenting is going to be as rewarding as it is hard. Anything worth having is not just going to fall into your lap. And, you get out of life what you put into it.

So if there is a way I can impart this knowledge into Liam's head without crushing his dreams I will do it. Or better yet, I can sit cautiously on the sidelines and let him discover his own truths by himself.