Why won't you just LOVE me already?

Liam was invited to a birthday party today for his friend and classmate, Olivia. She invited ten friends from school to go to the Nature Center and partake in a nature walk, scavenger hike, games, cake, etc. Unfortunately the weather did not cooperate and the party had to be held inside the center where the was a roaring fireplace, stuffed wildlife and many, many DO NOT TOUCH signs. Beanie & I were only going inside the center for a few moments to drop Liam off, check in with Olivia's mom and head out. In the span of those few minutes, Beanie became a lad on a mission; a destructive, terrorizing mission...

(The following all took place in 2 minutes time...)

Sawyer immediately spotted the giant stuffed elk in the corner and ran to it at lightening speed. He grabbed hold of the "FRAGILE! Do NOT touch!!" elken fur and pulled and pulled then proceeded to attempt to climb and mount its back. I grabbed him and pulled him off, all while he was still clutching the "FRAGILE! Do NOT touch!!" elken fur causing the beast to wobble and tilt nearly taking it down completely.

The next target in Sawyer's sight was a horrified 15 month old boy who seemed to realize the moment he made eye contact with Sawyer that he should flee for his life. (Imagine a frightened baby zebra instinctively running away when it sees the ravenous lion licking his chops.) Little boy ran, triggering Sawyer's predatory instinct. He chased down the boy screaming "BABY! HUG!! HUG ME BABY!!!" Toddler boy ran away sobbing and weakly tried to wave Sawyer away. Still trying to save himself he ran, hititng his head on edge of table. Sawyer saw his opportunity and pounced and I pounced on Sawyer. "BABY! I hug 'em!!" he yells to me as I pulled him off.

Toddler boy ran off crying to his parental unit, I yelled at Sawyer. Toddler boy peeked from around his Dad's leg to see Sawyer watching him and bursts into more tears. Sawyer says "Dat baby C(r)ANKY!!!" I tell Sawyer he is cranky because he does not want to be chased down and loved by force. "But I want 'em!!!" Sawyer exclaims indignantly. I try to gather him up to get out of there before he could notice the sharp stone fireplace but before I could, he catches glimpse of the big bear off in the distance and the whole scenario repeats itself.

It was all I could do to get out of there without owing thousands of dollars in damages to the Nature Center as well as avoid a lawsuit to cover the emotional suffering of the toddler boy. Sawyer is a very determined little guy. You better love him, or else.