Boston 2010 is in the books. Sigh. The good news is that I finished and was fortunate enough to experience it all with good friends (and very talented runners). The bad news is that I finished nearly a half hour slower then I trained for, ended up in the Med tent (dehydrated, a bit hypothermic) AND lost my finisher's medal.
Sigh.
I know just qualifying is an achievement. I know finishing is a big deal and it is something most people won't experience or care to experience for that matter. I know these things and yet I am still disappointed. I appreciate all of the positive thoughts and words of encouragement from everyone who thought I did a good job. I do. I really do. I wish I could feel the same way, but I can't. Aside from feeling physically crushed and beat down, I feel mentally crushed and beat down as well. And believe me, the mental part is much more painful.
As dedicated marathoners, we put all of our eggs into one basket. We are gamblers. We invest months and months of hard training for just one day. One chance to cash in on our investments. When all the pieces come together it is a marvelous thing, and when it doesn't, it feels like an epic fail.
I know what I'm capable of running. I know what I can do, what I should have been able to do yesterday but it just didn't happen. Aside from going to the ortho a month and a half ago when I started to hurt, I don't think I could have done anything differently. And believe me, I tried to ignore it. But that is the beauty and curse of the marathon. It reveals to you your strengths and weaknesses over the course of 26.2 miles whether you want it to or not.
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